You Move Out of The House and the Place Starts to Fall Apart!

C went to go see his buddies this weekend, so I decided to head on over to my parents’ house for a little QT. Except my parents are out with friends, so I’m here by myself chilling with the dogs. And, to my dismay, it appears as if the place has fallen apart since I moved out! I feel like when Tony Soprano goes to visit his mother and finds that her place is a wreck and she’s burned half the kitchen down trying to cook mushrooms. Except my parents aren’t old and crazy and mean. They’re just busy. Here’s the situation: there’s no food in the house and the air conditioner is broken again! What kind of a life is this? Does these people not eat? If I wanted a snack right now I could choose between Wheat Thins, yogurt, and almonds. My parents must sit here and sweat and not eat. It’s like being part of some weird cult! I need to stop the madness. I’d be a little more concerned about their well-being except it’s 10:30 and they’re still out gallivanting so…pretty sure they’re fine. And they just traveled to California and Boston for a two-week vacation. Yeah, they’re definitely fine. In fact, they’re probably cooler than me. I guess I can stop filling out their nursing home application now. I just hope there’s not another snake in their air conditioner which is causing it to malfunction. Remember the time that happened? Yeah…Okay, I’m going to go back to enjoying the sweat lounge. Ciao.

 

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