Why An Attitude Adjustment is Crucial For Your Social Life

Recently I wrote about a terrific book I read called MWF Seeking BFF. The book is about a newlywed who moved to Chicago with her husband, and then went on a quest to expand her social circle in her new town. The book’s protagonist, Rachel, tried a variety of methods to make friends, and ended up with a solid group.

One of the ideas in the book that stuck with me the most was Rachel’s approach to her search. She noted that before her friend-making adventure began, she never really paid much attention to the person waiting in line in front of her at the coffee shop, her friend’s friend who joined them at the bar, or the woman who held the door for her at the yoga studio. When her search for new pals began, that all changed. Rachel soon started viewing everyone as a potential friend. She wasn’t creepy about it, but she became more open to talking to people she didn’t know, or only casually knew. Whereas before, she’d only venture to a limited number of places, she then became much more willing to try new things.

I found that really inspirational, and I’ve recently tried to adopt this attitude too. I’m trying to be more open about the way I socialize. Whether it’s where I go or the people I go with, I’m trying to be more adventurous and open-minded. I’m the type of person who loves control, so it’s not always easy for me to give these new situations a shot. However, I’m realizing that getting outside of your normal routine is a great way to break up monotony and to fight boredom.

This past weekend, I headed to a bar I’d never been to, in a part of town I don’t normally frequent. I went with a close friend and her friend, who I only sort of know. Normally, this situation would have sent me into a tailspin, as embarrassing as that is to admit. Too many new and unfamiliar things and I get anxiety. However, I was really focused on embracing a change of scenery and some new interactions. It turned out to be a great night. I’m glad I went, instead of curling up with a book and my couch, as I was tempted to do. I enjoyed seeing a new spot, and had fun with the new social dynamic. The inspiration from the book definitely served me well.

If you haven’t read MWF Seeking BFF, I’d recommend it.

How do you keep your social life interesting? Do you and your friends try out new classes our social spots? Do you venture places solo in order to build new connections?

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