I'm Not in Kansas Anymore, Toto: The Great Cockroach Extravangaza

I’ve been having a great time checking out my new home over the course of these past few days, and discovering all the fun things that a bigger city like Charlotte has to offer. However, one of these new and unfamiliar things comes in the form of cockroaches. I’d been lucky enough to have gone 25 years without seeing one, but that all changed two days ago. Apparently what I encountered was a Palmetto bug aka a HUGE ass cockroach that flew and hissed. In my mind, that thing was the devil in insect form. Fortunately, my roommate grew up in the south, so she was much better equipped to handle this thing than I was. You’ll see what I mean when you watch this video of us trying to kill the monster:

After I stopped recording we took the battle outside, where my roomie Ashley SMASHED that sucker with a shoe as I screamed and flailed and maybe peed a little. When it was basically unrecognizable, we felt satisfied and went inside. Terrifying.

Of course, being the anxiety ridden person that I am, I’m now just waiting for another attack. I shake out all my clothes before putting them on and eye the drain when I’m the shower, expecting to see some bug eyeballs staring back at me. I spent probably 50 bucks on various forms of roach killer, including spray and stuff you put in the drain. I also made an exterminator come to continue the chemical warfare. The line “That’s just what you get in North Carolina” did NOT work on me. I want them all dead.

I’m trying to pump myself up and tell myself that I’ll kill the next one I see with no problem, but….we all know that’s probably a lie. So far, roaches have been the biggest hurdle I’ve had to overcome, so I’m pretty thankful for that. But seriously, if I see another one I’m running out of the apartment and burning it down behind me as I go.

Any tips for managing these evil beasts? Please help! 

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