Being Single is Not an Issue That Requires Fixing


Lately I keep seeing all of these articles about “What Type of Single Girl Are You?” (with types including “The Mess” and “The Princess”) and “Why Are You Still Single?” and “Ways Being a Sarcastic Girl Ruins Your Chances at Love” and such.

It baffles me that being single is viewed as some sort of condition that you need to fix. This is not a sinus infection or strep throat. You don’t need to remedy the situation before you go on with your day. And for many people, women especially, there seems to be a tendency to blame ourselves for our singleness. If only we were __________ we would meet the right person. If only we were less picky/in better shape/etc. then we would find someone great.

Other people often treat singles as a lower class too. You get stuck at the kids table at Thanksgiving if you’re showing up without a significant other, for example. Your relatives spend far too much time racking their brains trying to think about someone to set you up with, not even considering that maybe you’re enjoying this period in your life.

Speaking of enjoying being single, you can and you should. There are SO many perks to flying solo. These include:

  • The ability to travel without telling anyone about your plans (except the people you’re coming to visit, probably)
  • Taking up the whole bed as you sleep
  • Sleeping in late and not being ashamed of your laziness
  • Learning to enjoy time alone with your thoughts
  • Time to pick up that hobby you’ve always wanted to try
  • The ability to call “dinner” a bowl of cereal standing in your kitchen reading a magazine without judgement if that’s what your heart desires

I could go on and on, but you get the idea.

I don’t know why being single is viewed as a sad state of affairs. Personally, I’m really enjoying it. Obviously I want to get married at some point, but I don’t feel as if my life is lacking now. But even if you’re a little less thrilled about being single than I am, it’s important not to turn the focus inward and blame yourself. Because when you do that, you start to give off vibes that mask your genuine and authentic awesome self. These feelings you’ve got cooking in your brain show themselves either in desperate, bitter, or other scary ways when you’re out and about. Trust me, you’re NOT a mess. You’re not undateable. You’re really not! You’re great, and someday someone else will see that greatness too. Enough of those articles.

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