The Pretzel-Hummus Ratio in Sabra Travel Packs is Never Right: My Airport Realizations

The 7 Realizations All Frequent Fliers Have

I travel a lot for work, so much so in fact that my friends call me Lauren San Diego. While a tad draining, spending a lot of time in airports has also allowed me to learn some fascinating things about travel, airports, and people as a whole. These include:

When resources are limited, $6 for a bottle of Fiji water seems reasonable

When I go out to eat, unless I’m drinking a cocktail I’m not paying extra for a beverage. When I’m at the airport? Totally different story. A $6 bottle of water feels like a steal. Actually, I’ll grab one of those $4 tubs of Sabra on the go that has a ton of hummus and roughly 7 pretzels too while I’m at it.

I have no idea how people meet their spouses on planes

You hear all these stories about people meeting their significant others on planes/in airports, but based on years of field research, I have no idea how this happens. I have never once found myself in close proximity to an attractive man at any point during my travels. Which is maybe for the best because I tend to airport sweat.

TSA Precheck is a godsend

If you travel a lot, particularly during busy times like holidays or school breaks, I’m telling you INVEST THE MONEY. It’s $85 for five years and you get to skip the long lines, keep your shoes on, and keep your laptop safely in its bag. If you’re living in Charlotte, I wrote an article about how to get it here for CharlotteFive.

Traveling in business attire makes you feel important, is uncomfortable

The last time I flew, I decided to just stay in my work clothes throughout the duration of the trip. This meant I was setting myself up for a total of 15+ hours in heels and a pencil skirt. While I felt like Joan from Mad Men as I strutted through the airport, by the time I reached my house I couldn’t rip everything off and pull on sweats fast enough.

Children are adorable and also very loud

The last time I flew, we had a situation where a baby in the front of the plane would scream, then a baby in the back of the plane would scream in response, then front of plane baby would scream again and rinse and repeat. It’s sort of like when your dog barks and dogs three neighborhoods away respond. Except way more high-pitched and grating. But they were so cute I couldn’t even be that mad. I was conflicted.

You don’t know how badly you have to pee until you’re in the window seat 

It always feels the most urgent right when everyone is all settled and the plane is about to take off.

Women can be disgusting

Guys get flack for being gross in bathrooms, but trust me I’ve been into some women’s restrooms that are like war zones. Also, public restrooms need to get their purse hook game on point. I don’t want to put my bag on the floor after some of the things I’ve witnessed.

Lastly, there truly is no place like home. After a long day of travel, there is no better feeling than flopping on your bed as you sip some wine and eat some hummus. It’s absolute heaven.

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  1. Bryce G says:

    OH. MY. GOD. The hummus thing is so true.

    I travel a lot.

    Yes to all of the above. 🙂 Flying through CLT in about a month. Typical layovers are CLT, PHX, PHL, ORD and DFW. Can you guess who I fly? 😉

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